Assembly Required; May 19 2019

Last Monday, I bought a little red bird. A fake one at a craft store, obviously; a pet bird at this time of my life would not be the wisest purchase, given that I have cats and a baby already on my list of dependants.

It was kind of an impulse buy. I just liked this little bird, but knew damn well I had no use for it. Unless...

Living near the GTA in Canada means I have access to one of the biggest nerd conventions of the year, Anime North. I’ve been attending every year since 2008, with the exception of last year – I was WAY too pregnant to haul myself to a con. I’ve also been cosplaying since then, though I do most of it by bumming costumes off my partner. She sews, I don’t.

So I see this little red bird and get a flash of inspiration. There’s a character I like who has a little red bird on the shoulder of their suit of armour. Roswell, from the Adventure Zone podcast. What a costume that would be – just a suit of armour seeping clay and carrying around a bird! Complex (especially since I have never made armour before) but I didn’t necessarily have to have it finished for Anime North. It could just be a fun project.

Cut to less than a week later, and I’m in the painting stages of this monster.

I’m determined to have it completed in time, since I’ve become a little disenchanted with the convention scene. See, I used to run lifestyle panels about asexuality, polyamory, and relative subjects. All very good stuff. However, the messages of those panels were apparently ‘too political’ and not well received. Despite being wildly popular, they weren’t approved to run this year.

Now, I have a lot of feelings about this, but they can be summed up like this: That’s Bullshit.

The idea behind these panels was helping to normalize and inform people of all the healthy ways to live a different lifestyle. This is the con that runs panels such as Gay Sex 101; sexuality panels sure as hell have a place here, despite their excuse that I was rejected because our subjects don’t directly relate to anime.

Being shot down isn’t a new experience. I’m a writer; my job is being rejected. Still, this one grates on me particularly hard. I remember a pair of teenagers approaching me after Polyamory 101 one year and earnestly thanking me for everything I said; they were keeping their mutual girlfriend secret from their parents and had felt ashamed, like they were doing something fundamentally wrong by loving more than one person. Having these informative discussions quashed could be the difference between someone feeling validated and normal, and not.

I’m still going to Anime North this year, because I love to cosplay and most people look at you strangely if you parade around in a suit of armour any other day. Here’s hoping this one is a good enough experience to salvage the convention for me, though, because if you think I won’t be lowkey bitter the whole weekend otherwise, you’d be woefully incorrect.

Anyway, let’s have part 2 of our impromptu story!

“You should have had him put down a bowl or something, first. Maybe a tarp.”

I took a step back from the blood-soaked altar of Seyhra and threw my knife aside, listening to the three of them hum and hesitate.

“Zaccheus, could you... I don’t know... drag some of it around? Paint a picture with it? Write something?”

“You want me to paint a picture with the blood of my best friend,” I repeat, flat with incredulity. “Presumably with my hands?”

“It doesn’t have to be of anything in particular.”